Hi Guys,
Sorry for not begin
around, but didn’t have my laptop long in hospital as started doing
leave. Although I found it difficult I know that its not an easy
ride, and I accept that. As of today I am back home full time :)
As I think I have
said before I go to a survivors group in Eastbourne, and I wanted to
use this post, especially as I went tonight, to write about how I
appreciate the group and what it does for me.
I started going over
2 years ago now, at first it was really scary, but I was leaving
Lavender and I wanted somewhere I could go where I felt accepted and
could talk about the issues of being a survivor. I have been to
groups before and didn't get on with them, but they have all been
behavioural therapy groups. So I was absolutely terrified before I
walked in. I had so many questions going though my head, what would
other people be like? Would people expect me to talk? And so on and
so on. I soon found that although I was very very anxious I felt
welcomed from the minute I walked through the door, and that support
groups are very different to behavioural therapy groups where they
want you to just modify your behaviour.
My friends are
fantastic, and they are my family, but I wanted somewhere I could go
that I didn’t feel that I was “putting on” them, not that my
friends make me feel like that, but I sometimes (OK a lot) worry
about it. The group I go to is unique because its for both male and
female survivors and for their partners. I was scared by males at
first, but I have found by going that I am actually less scared by
them in the general world than I was before, as people have made me
realise that not all males are out to get me, like in my history.
I feel appreciated
and that people get me, and my dissociation as well as the DID. I
find that when I talk I get good feedback with ideas that I can try,
something that in a way that only people who have been there, in
similar situations, can do.
As people know from
reading this, I haven’t had the best of years, and the group, as
well as my friends have been there. And I have made friends through
the group. I am so glad that I took that step and walked through that
door back in 2012, and didn’t run away as every bone in my body
wanted me to do, as it has helped me survive!
Lots of love
Luce xxx
if you want more info on the group in Eastbourne, please go to the website
